Introduction

This page contains the full text of our wedding vows. For more pictures, see the wedding page.

Once Cristyn and I were engaged, we spent a good deal of time discussing what we wanted the ceremony to be like. Larry, the preacher who officiated, was willing to go along with just about whatever we wanted. So what did we want? Traditional, more or less... but without any nonsense about who should obey whom. No 'leaving and cleaving.'

This still left a lot of room. One thing we did was to search the internet to see what other people had done. We found this very helpful, both to see what we liked and what we didn't. Maybe this page will be of help to some other couple. It's a nice thought.

As a practical matter, we decided to have the ceremony involve us saying as little as possible. We didn't want to freeze up and forget our lines in all the excitement. This was probably a good idea; in the actual ceremony, the preacher left out the line "you may kiss," and we stood there waiting for our next cue. After a nervous moment, somebody mumbled something, and I gave Cristyn a quick kiss. Unsatisfied by this, she grabbed me and gave me a deep, passionate kiss. Even with the script, she made room for a little improvisation.

The words "in proximity and in distance" were added quite deliberately, since we knew that our academic careers would probably have us living in different places eventually. As of this writing, I'm teaching in Maine and she's studying in California. We're still very happy together, even when we're apart.

The ceremony

Processional: In My Life (Lennon/McCartney)

Wedding march: Love theme from Romeo and Juliet (Mancini)

Prayer?

Dearly beloved, we are gathered in the presence of God and in the fellowship of this community to join together Cristyn Brown and P.D. Magnus.

Who brings Cristyn to be married to P.D.?

Lloyd + Gwyn: We do.

Lloyd + Gwyn take their seats.

Marriage is a covenant of faith that endures all things, in which husband and wife communicate with one another and trust in one another. Marriage is a covenant of hope, in which husband and wife commit themselves to the work of making a life together, creating a lasting future where the hopes of each are the hopes of the other. Marriage is a covenant of love, in which husband and wife strive to treat one another with understanding and compassion.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Do you P.D. take Cristyn as your wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in proximity and in distance, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, with trust and understanding, with patience and fidelity, as long as you both shall live?

P.D.: I do.

Do you Cristyn take P.D. as your wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in proximity and in distance, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, with trust and understanding, with patience and fidelity, as long as you both shall live?

Cristyn: I do.

Have you brought tokens to stand as signs of your love and commitment?

Us: We have.

P.D.: With this ring I thee wed. Cristyn, please wear it as a sign of the depth of our love.

Cristyn: With this ring I thee wed. P.D., please wear it as a sign of our lifelong commitment.

By joining in marriage, Cristyn and P.D. have one life together where before they had lives apart. Just as these two candles burn separately, when brought together they may light a single flame.

Cristyn + P.D. light unity candle.

P.D. and Cristyn, in the sight of God and this community, you have vowed fidelity to one another in holy matrimony and represented these vows with the exchange of rings and the lighting of the candle. I now you pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss.

Smooch.

Let me be the first to announce you: P.D. and Cristyn Magnus.

Recessional: Don't Get Around Much Anymore (Ellington)